Posts Tagged future

Within her circle of stones
She drifts back to that place
Casting out shadows
Demons handsome face

Once lost in his darkness
A labyrinth of despair
Longing for an illusion
Twin flames sweet embrace

That lone wandering drifter
Disguised as a sage
Stealing souls
Trying to make it pay

She felt he was coming
Hyena slowly circling
Hell fires burning
Raging like lightening

Call down the thunder
Glance back courageously
Lifetimes spent stalking
Doors opening and closing

Atonement is sought
Peace offered up
Discounting her wrath
Holding nothing from the past

It is no accident that she sees these things, these glimpses of the future and what lies behind the veil of façade in which some choose to linger. There are no accidents and they always seem to come at an appropriate time in her life; just when she needs the clarity most, but still, always surprising and completely unexpected.

She knew there was a certain level of craziness in him, but wanted to believe it was more of a rebelliousness than actual lunacy; although he claimed to be insane more than once, almost to the point of bragging; as if being insane and unable to control his thoughts and function in society was something to be proud of; an achievement of those with superior intelligence and knowledge. He was intelligent, of that there was no doubt; and strange enough, it was his mind and perception of life that attracted her in the first place, which left her wondering of her own mental stability in the end.

He preached change, was obsessed with changing, always claiming to have or be in process of changing; but people like him don’t change, just talk a good line of bullshit and continue wandering aimlessly; alone, taking up space and doing absolutely nothing for the greater good of mankind, and leaving a trail of destruction and debris in their wake.

She saw him walking the streets along the bay; baggy shorts, sandals and a Hawaiian touristy shirt; a 280 pound chic magnet in tow, in the form of a St. Bernard named Bud. He looked just as he had, but older with rougher edges and quite a bit heavier and wider; still talking his crap, looking for the next big score; still no pot to piss in or window to throw it out of; no longer able to count on his looks and words to lure them on his own, letting Bud do the work of hooking them, as he tried his damndest to reel them in.

Eventually they all stopped listening and even in darkness he couldn’t find peace, as the voices in his head refused to stop taunting. He lived a life of loneliness, claiming to have wanted it that way, but he was a liar and a con, left to reap exactly what he had sown. Unable to hold even the most menial of jobs; no money to feed himself or his dog, he wandered the streets panhandling, with that single copy of the book he had penned, designed and produced years ago by a chic whose name he’d long since forgotten; pages yellowed and dog-eared, no one listening to the raving lunatic, who stood on the corner and read excerpts aloud, from the book by an author no one ever heard of.

She appeared out of nowhere at the stroke of midnight, as if having emerged from within the lake; a mirage of convenience, claiming to possess the key to get me back into the kingdom. Clearly taken aback at my hesitation, she promised to lead the entire way; guiding and navigating, until I found my self once more in the fold; where she swore I belonged, where she knew I wanted to be.

I considered her proposition momentarily, but in the end decided it just wasn’t worth the wasted time and emotion, not to mention that of the pain. No, there was no going back, not now that I’d come so far; perhaps for some this was the answer, but not for me; not any more.

Too many lifetimes spent built on lies; having had my fill of traditional thinking. Not quite certain what the answer yet is, but refusing to go back to the way it was; with so-called doctors all harboring god-complexes, anxious to get their hands on you; fuck with your head, dredge up the past, reduce you to rubble and call it healing.

“Ah, but you run in circles inside your mind; thoughts that won’t stop, driving you blind; and still you keep running, closer to the edge, you won’t slow and yet you refuse to look back. Don’t you see what you’re doing, lost in this maze; it’s quite clear you’re holding out hope, for a miracle or a sage; perhaps a keen philosopher to enlighten as you find your way…”

I held up my hand and told her to “Stop!”

Enough I’ve had of fools and sages, and let us not forget wanna-be revolutionary thinkers; doing nothing but rehashing and pondering the thoughts of other great minds; having no faith, no ability to love, nor the courage to grasp that which is their own; far too busy obsessing the condition of life, listening to the voices that haunt their own minds; not giving a damn, or too self-absorbed to recognize, the damage caused in the wake of self-fulfilling process.

“Thank you for the offer, but I’m doing okay; certain even that one day I’ll again find my way; without the influence, guidance or interference of another. Now if you don’t mind, please return to the lake, leave me in peace and don’t again show your face.”

Shrouded in a veil of mist, Alsyna vanished just as quickly as she appeared. I turned to make my way back toward the cabin, when something on the ground shimmered and caught my attention. I walked slowly to the waters edge, bent to retrieve the item off the ground; only to find myself standing in the moonlight, with an all-too-real key resting in my hand…